JourneywomanSex with the ex
May 8th 2008 09:39
I saw my most recent ex-boyfriend on the weekend, and it really hit me how attractive I still found him. We'd only been seeing each other for a month and has split on good terms, so there was no bad blood between us, and the attraction was most definitely there for both of us. We kissed, but took it no further. Which I was secretly happy about, because if there's one thing you want to avoid, it's sex with the ex.
Now, if you've just recently broke up with someone you were seeing for several years, you know the pain that comes with not having that person in your life. You might still be "friends" - that is, putting on a show of being polite and cordial with one another - but secretly, both of you are missing the intimacy and the companionship that the relationship had for you. The problem with having sex with them, however, is that if you do it more than three times, they're no longer your ex - they're your lover.
The way I see it, there was surely a good reason for breaking up with them, so why would you want to prolong your pain by making the breakup long and drawn-out? Ending a relationship is something that should be done with finality, because if you don't, you're risking causing yourself and your ex-partner a lot of grief. Never have sex with your ex, unless drama is what you like (and we're not talking good drama here, girls). Remember, a new relationship cannot begin when the waters are still murky from the last relationship steaming out of the harbour. Save yourself the misery and start looking for someone new. Best of luck to you.
Is it what you really want?
Now, if you've just recently broke up with someone you were seeing for several years, you know the pain that comes with not having that person in your life. You might still be "friends" - that is, putting on a show of being polite and cordial with one another - but secretly, both of you are missing the intimacy and the companionship that the relationship had for you. The problem with having sex with them, however, is that if you do it more than three times, they're no longer your ex - they're your lover.
The way I see it, there was surely a good reason for breaking up with them, so why would you want to prolong your pain by making the breakup long and drawn-out? Ending a relationship is something that should be done with finality, because if you don't, you're risking causing yourself and your ex-partner a lot of grief. Never have sex with your ex, unless drama is what you like (and we're not talking good drama here, girls). Remember, a new relationship cannot begin when the waters are still murky from the last relationship steaming out of the harbour. Save yourself the misery and start looking for someone new. Best of luck to you.
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Comment by Garrett Mickley
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And called me names for refusing the offer of their, ah, charms. How whacked is that JW?
Raven
Comment by RubySoho
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but nice post and i agree.
Comment by Louie
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Comment by The wonderful Peter Yang
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YOu have to think like a male player on this. Those guys had sex with plenty of hot girls (I want to know how they do it, anyway we are getting off topic here.) which they are attracted to, but that doesn't mean they want to marry those girls.
of course, I am not really encouraging you to act that way, of course. (honustly, it is none of my business in regards to this matter and I don't really care.) but just to give you an idea, that is all.
Cheers
Comment by Jarrah
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LOL
I don't think that is an ex.
Thats a never was.
Comment by Mr Nice Guy
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Not all chocolate is good chocolate - if you know what I mean.
Just ask anyone whose mistakenly gone to the medicine cabinet wondering why the thin chocolatey block they found tasted a little strange.
Mind you - they don't suffer worms anymore.
MNG
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Garrett and katyzzz, always appreciate you visiting my blogs, thanks muchly.
Raven, yes it is quite whacked. Quite.
Ruby, I haven't read The Rules, though I feel I should just to see what that book is all about. It's not the first time someone has said that!
Cheers Louie, right you are.
Peter, yeah my ex-bf is a bit of a player. I wish we were still together sometimes, but you have to rise above that desire.
Jarrah, a month still counts! He'd confirmed that were together, it just didn't work out and we're better off as friends.
lol MNG, good analogy there.
Cibbuano, you make it sound so appealing! Love the poetic line of thought, and yeah you're right it usually is a passionate encounter, because it's so taboo.
Like I say, it's best avoided!