JourneywomanHow to be romantic without looking like a sap
February 3rd 2008 09:31
I still remember my most romantic encounter with total clarity: my boyfriend of two years took me to my favourite beach, then read me a poem he’d written about the two of us, followed by a gift of a silver necklace with a simple heart pendant. I cried throughout the experience, I was so touched by his actions. What made it extra special is that he wasn’t the type to make grand romantic gestures, so I knew that what he did for me was coming straight from the heart.
I suppose that’s the key when it comes to romance; what you do must come from the heart. Being romantic isn’t about flowers, wine and chocolates – it’s about being considerate of your partner’s needs and letting them know, from time to time, how much they mean to you with a gesture that’s personalised to your relationship. And the gestures need not be grandiose – even something simple like cooking your girlfriend’s favourite meal for her when she’s had a long day at work will be noticed and appreciated. And don’t forget, every romantic gesture you make will come back to you, whether in bed or otherwise.
These days, women are used to not being romanced. That’s why we read those silly chick-lit books – they allow us to escape to a world where romance is part of the every day. Chivalry may be dead, but what kind of a world would we live in if romance took the same doomed path? Your wife or girlfriend needs to be reminded every now and then how much she means to you, in order to stay happy within the relationship. If she begins to feel that she’s being taken for granted, it won’t be long before the relationship turns sour.
But how do you go about being romantic without being a total wuss? Simple, just keep your actions personalised and avoid clichés. Finding out what her favourite flower is and giving her a single one is going to be far more effective than the old standby of red roses, as it shows you’ve put some thought into it. Flowers should be an occasional thing only, if you do it too often, you’ll look as though you’re trying to buy her favour. A framed photo of the two of you is also a great romantic idea, as it will remind her of the good times you’ve had together. A note that says ‘I love you’ tucked into her handbag so she finds it later in the day can work wonders, or, if you can manage it, write a poem about the two of you and it will absolutely blow her away. Trust me, I know! Remember, keep it simple, original and personalised when it comes to romance, and you can’t go wrong.
I suppose that’s the key when it comes to romance; what you do must come from the heart. Being romantic isn’t about flowers, wine and chocolates – it’s about being considerate of your partner’s needs and letting them know, from time to time, how much they mean to you with a gesture that’s personalised to your relationship. And the gestures need not be grandiose – even something simple like cooking your girlfriend’s favourite meal for her when she’s had a long day at work will be noticed and appreciated. And don’t forget, every romantic gesture you make will come back to you, whether in bed or otherwise.
These days, women are used to not being romanced. That’s why we read those silly chick-lit books – they allow us to escape to a world where romance is part of the every day. Chivalry may be dead, but what kind of a world would we live in if romance took the same doomed path? Your wife or girlfriend needs to be reminded every now and then how much she means to you, in order to stay happy within the relationship. If she begins to feel that she’s being taken for granted, it won’t be long before the relationship turns sour.
But how do you go about being romantic without being a total wuss? Simple, just keep your actions personalised and avoid clichés. Finding out what her favourite flower is and giving her a single one is going to be far more effective than the old standby of red roses, as it shows you’ve put some thought into it. Flowers should be an occasional thing only, if you do it too often, you’ll look as though you’re trying to buy her favour. A framed photo of the two of you is also a great romantic idea, as it will remind her of the good times you’ve had together. A note that says ‘I love you’ tucked into her handbag so she finds it later in the day can work wonders, or, if you can manage it, write a poem about the two of you and it will absolutely blow her away. Trust me, I know! Remember, keep it simple, original and personalised when it comes to romance, and you can’t go wrong.
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Comment by Garrett Mickley
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The ability to write well, and some sort of chivalry instinct.
But this is a very good article for the guys not lucky, like me, to be gifted with this.
And it truely is a gift.
Comment by Always Eighteen
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I think the rest is media hype.
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Comment by Optomistic Opportunism
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Optomystic Opportunism
I find that the best way to be romantic is to not do it too often - only when the mood really suits the situation. Otherwise its another failed attempt.
But some guys do seem to get away with it, mind you.
Comment by Mr Nice Guy
Pop Culturist
I don't think alot of guys get it either to be honest.
Commercialism and history tell us what to do - even though it soooo hackneyed.
I've been as guilty as any - yet just the other day we shared a moment when I found myself just stroking my wife's hair - don't ask me where it came from - but it was so connective - and unplanned - something she said was romantic in its own way.
Thanks for reminding us all Journeywoman - that sometimes (well quite often) its the heartfelt that matters.
MNG
Comment by Journeywoman
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Opto, yeah I decided that an anonymous tag was better, given the nature of what I write about. I can be more personal in my writing without my real name attached. Yay for anonymity I say.